- A man who waits for a cloudless day to mow his hay may never dry it in time.
- Don't pull up your garden to see if it's growing.
- Blowing at the smoke doesn't help if the chimney is plugged.
- The problem with a little sin is that it usually grows into a big one.
- Bend the branch while it is young.
- Lying in bed dreaming never got the work done.
- Give a man bread and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to plow and he will feed his family for the rest of his life.
- A woman's kisses may fade away, but her good cooking rarely does.
- A round wife and a full barn are the signs of good success.
- If you want to keep a secret, don't whisper in your wife's ear.
- When a person slaps you on the back, he may be trying to help you swallow something.
- Death isn't the greatest loss in life. It's what dies inside of us while we live.
- "So what would you do if someone gave you two cows?" a skeptic asked.
"I'd give both of mine to charity, and expect my reward in heaven," the Quaker said.
"I'd give my two cows to the colony, and they'd keep my family in milk," the Hutterite said.
"I think I'd keep one of my cows, and trade the other for a bull," the Amish man said.
- If you want to make your money last, you have to make it first.
- Being human is a privilege, not an excuse.
- If you must doubt, doubt your doubts, not your beliefs.
- The hardest mountains in the world to climb are the ones made out of molehills.
- There's a difference between good sound reasons and reasons that sound good.
- The way some people look for faults, you'd think there's a reward.
- Difficulty is a miracle in its first stage.
- Anyone who practices what he preaches doesn't have to preach much.
- Some people work hard to keep their children from having the problems which made men out of their fathers and women out of their mothers.
- Every man must live with the man he makes of himself.
- Usually the less we know the longer it takes to explain.
- We don't realize how wonderful today is until tomorrow.
- It's not the revolutions that destroy the machinery, it's the friction.
- Everything in the home today seems to be run by switches, except children.
- Our fathers teach us what we should become, our mothers teach us what we are.
- Signs for an Amish mother that your teenaged boy might be in trouble:
- It's Saturday afternoon and the deacon's buggy just drove in the lane.
- You discover colorful socks in his dresser drawer.
- You hear soft music coming from the hay mow.
- He has addressed you in Englisch.
- You opened the barn door and heard him whistling Yankee Doodle to the cows.
- He is waxing the dashboard of his buggy.
- He forgot to take his sister home from the hymn singing.
- He wants to name his new driving horse Camaro.
- He claims the Bishop's daughters are watching the house with field binoculars.
- He's wearing his straw hat backwards.
- Poverty is not a shame unless you are slothful.
- Making no choice when we have to choose is itself a choice.
- If you aim at nothing, you're bound to hit it.
- You begin to slip when you'd rather win an argument than be right.
- Big ships can only be launched where the water is deep.
- Give some people an inch and they want to be rulers.
- Mose Stutzman went to the banker in town as a last desperate move to purchase the spring's harvest seed.
"What do you have as collateral?" the banker asked.
"What is collateral?" Mose asked.
"That's something you agree to give me to sell in case you lose my money," the banker replied.
"You can have my prize set of Belgians," Mose said.
"That'll be perfect," the banker agreed, and Mose got his loan.
Six months later, Mose was back. He repaid the loan with interest, all of it with cash. Seeing the wad of bills left over, the banker asked Mose, "Would you like to deposit the extra cash for safekeeping? We pay a small amount of interest."
Mose thought for a moment and then said, "What have you got for collateral?"
- A politician unfamiliar with the Amish ways stopped in at Henry Mullet's place.
He walked up to young Luke, who was busy milking the cow out by the barn.
Before the politician could get many words out of his mouth, Henry opened the front door and hollered out, "What does he want, Luke?"
"He's a politician," Luke said.
"Well then, get in the house at once and bring the cow with you," Henry hollered back.
- Little and often make much.
- A narrow mind and a wide mouth usually go together.
- The more you know, the more you know you don't know.
- The best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice you give others.
- If you want a place in the sun, you will have to expect some blisters.
- If we growl all day we're likely to feel dog tired at night.
- Don't call the world dirty because you've forgotten to clean your windows.
- A man is never old until his regrets outnumber his dreams.
- A woman is perturbed by what a man forgets, a man by what a woman remembers.
- A bachelor is a man who's too fast to be caught or too slow to be worth catching.
- It takes both rain and sunshine to make the garden grow.
- A tourist stopped in at the farm where old Elmer Yoder was busy pumping water with his hand pump.
"Where's route forty?" the tourist asked.
Elmer ignored him, continuing to draw water.
"Where's route forty?" the tourist now shouted.
Old Elmer continued filling his bucket.
"Are you ignorant or deaf?" the tourist shouted next.
"Both," Elmer said, finally turning around. "But at least I'm not lost."
- If you think you have influence, try ordering some else's dog around.
- In nature there are neither rewards nor punishments. There are only consequences.
- He who strikes the first blow confesses that he has run out of ideas.
- The archer who overshoots his mark does no better than he who falls short of it.
- A mistake is evidence that you have tried.
- Better to let them wonder why you didn't speak than to wonder why you did.
- The steam that blows the whistle can't be used to turn the wheels.
- Be what you wish others to become.
- Worse than failure is the failure to try.
- Judge a man by his questions, not by his answers.
- The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.
- Betty … "You have to marinate this meat. It makes a real tasty treat using the steaks."
"I don't have a recipe," Hannah said. "I'm sure you do, though."
Betty nodded. "Don't let me forget to give it to you before you go. You're staying for supper. A late supper."
- Idleness causes problems only work can solve.
- A person who knows everything still has a lot to learn.
- The deacon was sent out by the bishop on Saturday afternoon to speak with Leo and Leona Troyer about their Ordnung transgression.
"Did you not fly the plane out to Oregon the other week?" the deacon asked.
"No," Leo said, as Leona shook her head. "There was someone else called a pilot flying the thing."
"I see," the deacon said. "I guess that does make it a less serious matter."
- No man is so wise that he knows everything, nor is any man so stupid he knows nothing.
- An ounce of work is worth a ton of wishing.
- If a dollar doesn't do what it used to, remember that hardly anyone else does either.
- We are seldom aware of what's cooking until the pot boils over.
- Throw mud and you will have dirty hands, whether the mud hits the mark or not.
- A great deal of what we see depends on what we are looking for.
- Sign on a buggy: "The original green energy with the original odor."
- If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, perhaps they take better care of it there.
- You shouldn't worry if you don't know all the answers—you probably won't be asked all the questions.
- Bert and Leona Weaver were out on a Sunday afternoon drive visiting relatives.
Before leaving the house, Bert had insisted he wear one of his work shirts, over Leona's strenuous objections.
He then made things worse by wearing his work shoes.
Silence had settled in the buggy, and passing a barnyard filled with mules and pigs, Leona motioned with her bonnet, "Might those be relatives of yours?"
"Ya," Bert said. "They look like in-laws."
- Maybe you don't have everything you want, but neither do you have everything you don't want.
- The less a thing can be proved the hotter we get arguing about it.
- It is difficult to take advice from some people since they need it so badly themselves.
- People with weak arguments have to develop strong voices.
- The Amish man and his young son made a visit into town, stopping in at the high-rise hotel to look around.
Inside the lobby, they saw the row of elevators with their blinking lights overhead.
Gawking, they watched people getting on and off.
Once the crowd had cleared, an older lady approached the elevator and disappeared inside.
Moments later the lights blinked again, and the door opened.
A much younger woman stepped out.
The Amish man turned to his son and said, "Let's go home at once and bring your Mamm back here."